Vanity a thing of the past, replaced by new F words: Fatigue and Follicles

(Today's entry is prompted by my not doing a very good job of responding to email -- so please forgive and don't stop emailing ME!! I'm up for all the attention I can get, as always.)

Yesterday I sincerely tried to quit radiation, but was given a prescription for Tylenol with codeine and the suggestion of Benadryl cream instead. Thus armed, I'm pretty sure I could sleep through the next 9 days if only I didn't have to show up for treatment every afternoon.

The past two weeks have introduced me to Fatigue the likes of which I'd only ever seen heretofore on the faces of very, very sick people.

For a few days I tried perking myself up with Adderall, but it worked for a shorter and shorter period of time each day and higher doses found me feeling druggy and sick to my stomach. It wasn't worth it.

The itchy, red rash on my chest, I'm told, is an encampment of enraged hair Follicles. I hadn't thought of myself as particularly hairy-chested, but apparently I hadn't been paying close attention. The rash, extending from neck to armpit and concentrated most angrily just over my heart, makes comfortable clothing impossible. 'Just one more reason to want to stay at home, on my back, preferrably asleep.

Today radiation switches from TomoTherapy to the robotic zapper machine used for my whole 6-week stint last time. These last 7 treatments with the robot will be concentrated on the scar tissue only (a "radiation boost"), so I'm hopeful the widespread rash will subside and I'll be willing to resume greater activity in the next week or so . . . ? I fear the effects of this lack of exercise in which I've been indulging, believe me.

Oddly enough, I checked with my psyche today and we agree my mental status is better than it was two weeks ago. My sister Elaine claims this is undoubtedly due to her being in town, though I suspect the addition of buspirone for anxiety may be at least partially contributing to a better outlook. Also, I have the start of a 5-o-clock shadow where my bald head used to be. I like to think things are (going to be) looking up.